Monday, March 31, 2008

Confessions of a Cockroach-phobic

It's 2 a.m in the morning. I was on my way to the toilet when I met my mortal enemy... the detestable cockroach. Alamak... both my cockroach-busters were sound asleep, i.e. my parents. It's now left to me alone. Wonder where my mum kept the insecticide....sigh. She was the one who kept it. If it was my dad, he is more environmental friendly. All he needed to do was to catch the cockroach with his bare hands and out of the window the cockroach will be. Wonder how he managed to do that. Anyway, try my luck. I opened the cupboard where I presumed my mum would keep the insecticide. Lo and behold, it was there, just by the door of the cupboard. I aimed the nozzle at it and sprayed. The cockroach ran. I sprayed at it as if there was no tommorow until it didn't run anymore.
How come I am so afraid of cockroaches? Well, it all started when I was still very young, living in my old house at Geylang. Once a young cockroach was hiding in one of my shorts. I didn't notice it. Then suddenly I felt some tickling sensation. I quickly took off the shorts and there it was... yucks....

Speaking of the old house, well, it had a back door. There's a courtyard and at one corner there was a tree. Not sure who planted it. It was there probably even before I was born. The six of us would squeeze in one bedroom. There was actually a narrow drain running in front of the room. There and then we would clean the drain and clear it of debris to prevent it from choking. So, I had been a drain cleaner when I was young...XD Not that there wasn't enough rooms; there were actually 2 others. But, it was used by my eldest uncle to store his goods. As you see, the house actually belonged to him and he used it as his warehouse. So, no choice had to squeeze. As my elder siblings grew older it became too clamped to stay together. So, a small room was constructed by tearing down an existing one which was already badly damaged by termites. Aiyoh, talked about that room. It was completely made of wood again. During the day, the room would be so hot that nobody stayed inside unless you want to get a heat stroke. But what a waste, if I had known what is a sauna then I would be up there during day time... ha ha ha. And when it was raining, the water-pipe there would leak. So, there would always be a pail and a piece of cloth wrapped around the place where it leaked.

And the house was a playground for pest - ants, cockroaches, mosquitoes, houseflies - you name it, there probably had it. There were even rats. My mum used to set traps to catch them. All of them would die a tragic death. The large ones were caught using metal traps. She would then pour boiling water over. As for the smaller ones, she would use a huge bowl and maybe a spoon or chopstick, I can't remember just to elevate one end of the bowl and under it would be the bait. Once the mouse pulled the bait at the correct direction, the bowl would cover it. My mum would then transfer it into a plastic bag and she would hit the bag against the wall... yheewww... As for the bowl, I think it was washed and used to hold food again. It was so long ago, I couldn't remember... yeeee..... I'm still alive, right?
Then, there was another type. It's not a rat at all. It's a shrew - small, with a long, black slender body and a pointy snout. My mother used to say that whenever you hear its squeak you will strike 4-D. Rubbish... our family used to hear it a number of times and yet we still didn't strike anything.
Spiders, yah there were the usual small, jumping spiders. However, sometimes there were those large, brown, long-legged ones. I had not seen them for a long time liao, even when I was staying there. Centipides were not uncommon. We just used our slippers to step on them.
Ants were ok lah. But, sometimes they would like to share our food. There were two types in the old house, the red and the black ones. The red ones were the more aggresive one; they got a nasty bite. Remember the tree at the courtyard? A colony of honey bee once built a hive there. Some time later, there was a battle between the bees and the red ants. The red ants tried to take the honey and the bees defended by stinging the ants. The bees can only use their sting once and they will die. So, there were bodies of dying bees littering on the floor. Of course the bees lost. After this, another colony tried to build a hive and it suffered the same fate.

Well, ever heard of "tiger bug" before? It's actually an assasin bug. Sounds sinister? The ones I encountered there were black in colour with a pointy head. At the end is a sharp probosis which it uses to stab the victim and draw blood. And both the insect and the victim will swell - the victim will experience localised swelling while the insect will be full of blood... hahaha. I, unfortunately, had been its victim. You wouldn't feel anything at all. I think its saliva contain both anticoagulant and anaesthesia, same like a mosquito. The way to kill it was to snip away the head with a pair of scissors. I wonder who came up with this idea. It had really been a long time since I last saw one.

Of course, cockroaches. Being at the ground floor, with the courtyard and drain, they were so common. Whenever I went to the toilet I would encounter them. The toilet was at one corner of the courtyard. There was a period of time when my father kept a number of arrowanas. So, all I had to do was called:"Pa, cockroach." He would catch it with his bare hands and throw it into the tank. So, they end up being fish food... a rather environmental way of getting rid of them. Sometimes, I would see a cockroach being dragged by a jewel wasp. My mother used to comment that it was under spell. In actual fact, it was paralysed by the wasp which would then dragged it to a safe place where it would lay an egg on it. When the egg hatched, the grub would have fresh food. There were a few times, when the heaven was generous and it rained for a few days. Our house would get flooded and you would see loads of cockroaches, big big small small, swimming... yucks.

Well, looking back, living there was quite fun actually. However, my mother said that the house was not clean, well you know, in the spiritual sense. So, we shifted to our present house when I was in secondary 2. I seldom go there now unless I wanted to go to National Stadium, then I would walked past there. It had changed a lot liao. Now, its full of hotels.

I guess my the time you finished reading the above, the cockroach would be dead by now with the generous amount of poison I showered on it... hee.... Otherwise, that can of insecticide can be thrown away liao. Now came another difficult task - to dispose of it. Heng... the light was quite dim and I wasn't wearing my spectacles. So it was quite blurry. I took to pieces of newspaper and swept it up. I quickly threw out of the door, washed my hands and went to sleep.


No comments: